The Fifth Eleminute

Pete the Retailer joins Crystal Beth and John Robert once again to talk about how great Christopher Fairbank (Mactilburgh) is, science scars for people with augmented intelligence and Cow Tales again.

This week Crystal Beth and John Robert are joined by Star Wars Minute’s Pete the Retailer! They discuss the Nucleolab, black lights and foil rooms of the future.

John Robert impresses Crystal by proving that Mars plays a part in this movie and makes her crazy by singing Colors of the Wind like he promised. They also read a few lines from the screenplay and get their first look at Zorg!

Crystal Beth and John Robert discuss what the Mondoshawan’s think of our advancements in space, how hard the PAs worked to make the ships so shaky and how the costumes hold up after 20 years.

Crystal and John enjoy talking about this nice relaxing minute by looking at Vito Cornelius’ picture book, talking about lawyers and safety regulations in the future and what could be inside of that angry, evil planet.

Crystal Beth and John Robert say goodbye to guest Tom Taylor as well as everyone’s favorite mugger, dance star and animated gif. It won't be as bad as it sounds though... they promise.

Guest Tom Taylor and hosts Crystal Beth and John Robert do their best drugged up mugger impressions, talk about the Internet Movie Firearm Database and how cool and tough Korben Dallas is. He is so cool and tough.

Guest Tom Taylor from Indiana Jones Minute visits with Crystal and John Robert and they talk about a possible Vin Diesel cameo, what Gemini Croquettes are and how exactly do people make coffee in the future?

John Robert and Crystal explore Korben’s apartment, discuss whether or not Vin Diesel is in the movie and how good Luc Besson is at introducing his characters.

In Minute 17 Crystal Beth and John Robert talk about General Staedert’s last stand and guess what! Bruce Willis is in this movie!

Crystal and John talk warship displays, what the government in 2263 would be like and try to figure out what SCAT is.

Crystal Beth and John Robert think that Headquarters should have a DJ to introduce people and Vito Cornelius makes his first appearance!

In Minute 14 we meet the strong, handsome and confident President of the Federated Territories. We see the four elements again and is Beardy Priest still alive 300 years later?

Minute 13 breaks down what is going on inside of General Staedert’s war ship and we begin to learn more about this mysterious phenomenon that is taking shape next to Jupiter.

Guest Host Alex Robinson, Crystal Beth and John Robert discuss whether or not the door closing on the Mondoshawan's hand kills him and what the clean up is like for Beardy Priest and Billy after the aliens leave.

Guest Host Alex Robinson, Crystal and John Robert discuss what they would do if they knew the world was going to end in three years. Apparently Alex has some feuds to settle...

Guest Host Alex Robinson joins Crystal and John Robert as they talk about the similarities between The Fifth Element and Star Wars, how the Mondoshawan shouldn’t be speaking English and discuss possible prequels and sequels of the The Fifth Element's opening characters.

The Mondoshawans say that war is coming and the stones aren’t safe on Earth anymore. They are right. Don’t trust humans with important things.

Why is the ship so wet? What do the Mondoshawan really look like? Why did Crystal wink? Where is a snail’s anus? We ask the important questions here.

Crystal Beth and John Robert give John Bennett AKA Beardy Priest the respect he deserves, figure out Aziz’s reflector system and talk about how scary children laughing can be.