Muscle for Life

Would you like to see a trick? With just one word, I can stimulate electrochemical responses in your brain associated with feelings of affection and joy. By merely uttering this three-letter rune, I can ignite your imagination, drench you in desire, and constrain you to my every command. And no, it has nothing to do with slapping slippery body parts together. Are you ready for this primordial talisman? *leans in close* N-E-W. Hear it again, with the velvety tone of buttery vocal pipes . . . New. Inhale it like the ripe breath of autumn. Let it race through you like chain lightning. Flare with it like a match dropped in a dry patch. New. New what, you wonder? Not one, not two, but a camel-load of only the finest fitness wares this side of Damascus are on the way, including . . . Balance A non-bacterial gut health supplement that'll help your body better process and absorb the food you eat. (Releasing next month.) Lunar Reflavoring A much-needed upgrade to our shuteye supplement’s flavor system, which is curren