Kate Hastings Show

Have you noticed in yourself a tendency to minimize your own needs? To not cause a fuss and keep the peace at all costs? These may be reflections of one of codependency’s main symptoms: self-betrayal.  Self-betrayal causes cognitive dissonance. This is when your heart and your head are saying different things. This creates inner conflict which is an invitation to address the issue that is out of alignment. If you are numbing out your feelings and denying reality, you don’t address the conflict. Breaking the cycle is about gaining self-love and self-worth. Know your value and what you deserve. Do not numb out your pain, rather learn to get your needs met in healthy ways.     Self-betrayal can look like: Allowing your boundaries to be violated so as not to be abandoned Going along with the group in order to be included Doing things to please others when it’s not what you want to do Letting someone else choose what you eat, how you dress Working in jobs that other influential people approve of, but you don’t li

I think one of the bravest things you can do is start something new when you're not “ready.” Nothing in life will be perfect, and no new beginning will be perfect. To be a beginner in anything takes courage, humility, and a willingness to just put yourself out there.  I was able to see more of my true self and grow into who I am today. I realized what truly mattered to me by looking at my own struggles and strengths.  Listen in to learn about my experience recording 100 episodes!!

Integration work is more than just joining a sharing circle, meditating, and eating clean. It signifies facing the shadow, all the forgotten, suppressed, invisible, and unintegrated mental material we left behind as we grew up and into the world.   At a very basic level, ayahuasca integration means cleaning up your act in support of your newly upgraded self. Job, relationships, diet, habits, mindset—all these are up for transformation in the weeks following ceremony. A second aspect of integration involves shadow work. Ayahuasca is a potent activator of the unconscious, bringing buried traumas, forgotten experiences, and rejected aspects of self to the light.  As we continue, a third level of integration emerges: the task of bringing soul to the world, showing up as our true whole selves. We begin to cultivate a way of being that is in touch with what really matters. Ayahuasca can be a very strong mirror.  She works in a way of bringing things up to the  surface, right in front of us. Giving us the  opportuni

You can begin to learn how lying was used as a traumatic response.  We only lie when it feels unsafe, to tell the truth.  In some cases, lying is the only way to avoid experiencing shame, dysregulation, or other unpleasant emotions if we tell the truth.    When I was a child, my father labeled me a snitch.  I was told I was fine when I wasn't, that everything was fine, that I just needed to get over it, that it didn't matter, that I didn't matter and that I had to get through it.  But my question to you is, who are you without your lies, suffering and pain?  Who are you if you didn't live or feel the desire to avoid pain? What possibilities would be available?

Before you can determine your life's mission, I believe it is more necessary and valuable to figure out what prevents you from becoming whatever you want to be in life.  You create this story to match your limiting beliefs, which manifest in a persona you identify with.  The true challenge isn't in the mission it's self its removing the barriers in the way that keep you in a stagnant place.

  @coachkate1

Gratitude  when it is possible. However, while some  from gratitude, for most it is challenging. The reason has to do with an overactive nervous system. For many survivors, the reactive part of the brain is in charge much of the time. This is not because they do not try—or do not want—to be positive. Their nervous system holds them in a constant state of  reactiveness. The pain of trauma has left them feeling “not good enough,” ashamed, guilty, injured, and unworthy. Their upper brain is not engaged enough to overcome those feelings and contemplate gratitude on an on-going basis.

What are you dependent on every day when you get out of bed?  Likes on social media, how many texts you receive, how many empty people pay attention to you, and how many calories you ate ????  Wake awake and cling to the carrot known as truth.    @coachkate1    

Because we don't properly grasp how to see, hear, and comprehend our needs, we don't feel seen, heard, or understood by others. The problem is that most of us are in so much pain and suffering just going about our everyday lives that we feel alone, disheartened, and alienated from our true self.    @coachkate1 Phenyx Fit 1-1 Wellness Coaching   

When we avoid doing the work that is required to heal, we create a reality of resistance, avoidance, and chaos. Even after the storms have passed, we leave an overcast of suffering, resentment, and disconnect. The aftermath is your identity becoming entwined with the impacted version of yourself. When you heal, you may experience a sense of loss because your identity is closely linked to the person you thought you had to become in order to move on.   @CoachKate1 

Have you ever asked yourself what does it truly take to change? I don't mean your physical body, bank account or hair. I’m referring to the type of change that drastically alters your perception of who you are and how you relate to the world. I’m talking about the type of change that provokes your very being at a core level that shifts your habits, emotions, behaviors and to a level of awareness. I can't tell you what the truth is but I can tell you what its not.  Tune in!! @coachkate1 

What would your life be like in 10 years if you kept up with your current lies? What's the impact of living this way, and what are you willing to lose? And if you can't face the truth or at least tolerate it, get honest and admit you live a lie by choice.   @coachkate1    

Struggle to see how anyone would want to help you?  Ask yourself these 3 questions:      • While you were growing up what kind of messages did you get about asking for help? • Did your family place more value on “doing it yourself” or “letting others in?” • When you did attempt to reach out in childhood, how did the people in your life respond?   @coachkate1

Remember that you are afraid of the response and emotion that the word no will conjure up in you, not the word itself. Saying yes when you want to say no comes at a price: You burn out, you experience anxiety, and you devalue yourself. You have relationships that are toxic and you become resentful. You disrespect yourself and allow added stress to play the victim to not focus on you and your life.  Remember that you don't have to respond right away.  You can say: I need to check my calander ill get back to you tommorw.  What is the impact of being a people pleaser?

Anxiety can manifest itself in various ways when it comes to relationships. Fear of being left behind or not asking for things could be signs of anxiety in a relationship.   It can control your thoughts and affect many aspects of your life. Anxiety crumbles your authentic voice, causing panic and lack of self-confidence. Do you ever ? Wondering if you matter? Wait for something to go wrong? Look for reasons to break up? Constantly thinking your partner wants to break up?  Missing out on good times?   @coachkate1 Phenyx.fit

Whenever something good happens, something bad follows. Living with the expectation that sh*t will eventually hit the fan makes it difficult to acknowledge and accept when life is actually going good. It's difficult to celebrate your success when you feel unworthy of your achievement.You are deserving of good things. You weren’t put on this Earth to live “well enough,” you are meant to live an abundant, beautiful life.   @coachkate1

I don't think we ever ask ourselves, "Are we living our truth?" or "What does that even mean?" Instead, I think we grow up to conform to the truths surrounding us, which may or may not be aligned, but I believe that no one except you can determine that meaning. Before you can live and express your truth, I believe you must first confront the extent to which you tell yourself lies. Ask yourself how much debt you have in your life? What's the impact of living this way? Is my environment and life consistent with my morals, values, and beliefs? Listen in! IG: @coachkate1 Website: Phenyx.fit 

Living in a perpetual state of survival is detrimental to our health, relationships, goals, and overall quality of life. Stress is a warning sign; it prepares us to survive, whether by running or fighting the threat. However, it is not a condition in which one may prosper or live life with peace.  You settle for a lot less because you're frightened actually to put yourself out there. So you isolate and keep people at a distance. You avoid, overcompensate, judge, fear, flee, and hide. Survival emotions and behaviors are hard-wired into our brains and nervous systems. The choices we make, our actions, and our perceptions are all influenced by the dysregulated emotions we are experiencing at any given moment.     @coachkate1 

When you're doing the work, but it's still difficult. We refuse to heal because we do not want to endure the unbearable pain of uncovering buried feelings, fears, and memories. You are unstoppable once you have fully immersed yourself in your truth. To avoid pain or discomfort, we typically control aspects of ourselves and our lives. Pain is unpleasant, so we do this to alleviate it. But we also do this because we are worried that we are not deserving of something greater.   IG: @Coachkate1 @phenyxfit