Sober Soul Recovery

Change might not come easily, but psychologists have developed a number of ways to effectively help people change their behavior. Many of these techniques are used by therapists, physicians, and teachers. Researchers have also proposed theories to explain how change occurs. Understanding the elements of change, the stages of change, and ways to work through each stage can help you achieve your goals.

Shine, Define and Realign   Awareness, Insight and behavior change   We all have the capacity, inner wisdom and intelligence to define and shape the world we live in.  Not the big global village, but the everyday life we walk around in.  Importantly, we have everything we need to achieve hope, harmony and happiness right inside our minds, bodies and souls.

Shine, Define and Realign   Awareness, Insight and behavior change   We all have the capacity, inner wisdom and intelligence to define and shape the world we live in.  Not the big global village, but the everyday life we walk around in.  Importantly, we have everything we need to achieve hope, harmony and happiness right inside our minds, bodies and souls.

Motivation is defined as the process that initiates, guides, and maintains goal-oriented behaviors. But what if we lack motivation and really need to change?  Lynn answers that burning question.

Learning to suppress or overly control our emotions has serious consequences. When we avoid our feelings, we tune out important clues as to who we are. We limit our capacity for self-understanding and fail to fully experience or shape our lives.

This week take a listen to learn this great secret tip!

Someone may appear to be one of the nicest and most selfless people you could ever hope to meet.  But hidden beneath the surface, there may likely be a simmering cauldron of conflict, rage and resentment.  Like many who are extreme people-pleasers, they find it impossibly difficult to say 'No', and have an uncontrollable, almost obsessive need for the approval of others, irrespective of whether they are colleagues, family, friends or strangers. 

Omar Pinto, founder of the recovery life coaching community SHAIR SPACE. of The SHAIR Podcast features new inspirational recovery stories every Tuesday.  He shares how he learned more about his feelings in the last two years of recovery than during his previous 13!

I get the logic of labeling, but I'm just tired of it. Not only the oldies, but the new ones too. Initially I called myself an alcoholic, but no more, it's not who I was or am. I was a person who got a lot of things done, really well, the old "high functioning" drinker. But, I was also a person struggling with how to cope with life, who hid it well, until I couldn't any longer...really didn't want to. How about we gather all this incredible energy for AF & DF recovery and take a lead from the documentary The Anonymous People and practice a new way!

Laurel Anne Stark is speaker, writer, mentor, entrepreneur and women in long term sobriety.  Laurel Anne learned from her “work hard, play hard” mantra and tells how she transformed her life of “trainwrecking around” by breaking up with alcohol and becoming a seeker of the sustainable home, health and work life. 

Without consciously acknowledging the need that is triggering the emotional reaction, we become enslaved to the need. On the other hand, if we honestly declare our needs—that we had expected people to treat us in a particular way and had hoped events would unfold as we had planned—then we can begin to see life more objectively. From this perspective, we are freer to choose our reactions.

In today’s society, we want immediate relief from discomfort, be it physical or emotional. The easiest, and most dangerous response for these women is to begin drinking just a little earlier in the day or take one or two of those pain killers in the medicine cabinet…or both. Such behavior is easily justified.  “All my friends drink during the day” or, “It IS a legal prescription, so what is the harm?” It is a very slippery slope and by the time awareness dawns, these individuals are frequently fully addicted.

Everybody is stressed, be it about a job, family, relationship, daily life or whatever. In this episode we reclaim the true understanding and meaning of what it is to be stressed and get to the core of how to beat it. 

People with perfectionism hold themselves to impossibly high standards. They think what they do is never good enough. Some people mistakenly believe that perfectionism is a healthy motivator, but that’s not the case. Perfectionism can make you feel unhappy with your life. It can lead to depression, anxiety, eating disorders, and self-harm. Eventually, it can also lead you to stop trying to succeed. Even mild cases can interfere with your quality of life, affecting your personal relationships, education, or work. A desire to achieve is healthy. But an irrational desire to always be perfect can cause problems. In this episode you will learn: Striving for excellence vs Perfectionism. How to identify your brand of perfectionism. Where does this desire loop come from? Super fun coping skills for becoming less perfect!

Perfectionism is a tricky little beast, isn’t it? For some, it’s a form of motivation – pushing one towards their goals, accomplishing feats, and helping them to succeed. But, let’s be real. There’s a fine line to walk with perfectionism, and the majority of us (I presume) fall on the wrong side – the side that causes us to obsess over small details, beat ourselves up when we think we fall short, and expect way too much of others.  Well, this past week it totally snuck up on me and almost derailed my motivation...take a listen and learn how I coped!

In the company of Women A place where women support one another with wisdom and celebrated each others’ successes and joys. Removing from our day to day lives the substances, behaviors, and beliefs that numb our creativity, intuition, and intelligence. We believe this is not only possible but vital for our collective future. This is why SoberSoul and The Recovery Lounge were created. To provide a safe place for women to find their voice and shine their light. A community of Recovering female leaders and change makers working along-side each other for a more beautiful future. We Are All Recovering From Something.

I chose today’s topic because of the emotions I have felt in the last week due to the intensity of the media coverage regarding the deaths of two high profile people.  My heart aches for them both, along with the families now suffering the layers of pain associated with a loved one who has taken their own life.   Many of us in the mental wellness healing field have been discussing how to best talk about this subject in an effort to help share this silent and scary trend which we have been observing in the last decade.     For my part, I have decided to focus on talking about a subject which Oprah called “a game-changer,  she stated "This story is so important to me and I believe to our culture that if I could dance on the tabletops right now to get people to pay attention to it, I would. It is definitively changed the way I see people in the world”.  Although Oprah shined her huge heart-centered world spotlight this last March, Adverse Childhood Experiences or ACES, I have seen little written about it since. 

Main Points:  How to recognize unhealthy boundaries? Breaking down boundaries. What’s ok and not is not ok, for your wellbeing? Expectations are premeditated Resentments! How we come to develop poor boundaries. 10 Doables for setting and building better boundaries.

Hey SoberSouls!  Lynn Matti here, the sober therapist, welcome!  This week I am entirely inspired by a recent blog by Brene Brown, The Midlife Unraveling at brenebrown.com.  I also have a request for my weekly listeners.  Although most of you are listening via my website, I am hoping you may be willing to visit Itunes and leave a quick rating or written review.  If you do not like the podcast, please let me know why if it is something I can improve or change via email at Lynn@sobersoulrecovery.net.  Thanks to the over  250 Itunes subscribers so far!

My very first guest here on on The SoberSoul Recovery Podcast is Veronica Valli.  Veronica has worked as a therapist and life coach specializing in addiction for over ten years; her experience includes working with young people in the criminal justice system, primary care adult treatment, outreach services and private practice.   Veronica has also worked in local government, delivering local drug and alcohol strategies.  As a recovered alcoholic and drug addict, she has personal experience of what it takes to recover from an addiction. Veronica struggled with alcoholism through most of her twenties. As a binge drinker, she was aware for some time that something was wrong but was unable to define what it was; a chance meeting led to her finally getting help and turning her life around.  At the height of her addiction, Veronica was unable to go to work without the aid of a drink; her life and confidence were in tatters. She got sober in 2000 at the age of twenty-seven.  She now uses this experience to help