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Parenting in the Rain, Episode 26 A Child is Like a Butterfly Are you a parent worried about your child through your divorce? Here’s a link to my s Free Parent Class http://jackieflynnconsulting.com/parentingthroughdivorce  In This Episode:   Just like a butterfly needs the struggle of emerging from the chrysalis to get it’s blood to it’s wings then ultimately fly, so does a child.   Giving children the gift of responsibilities sends them the message “I believe in you!”.  “I believe you are capable.” “You can difficult things.” “You are an important member of this family.”  Responsibilities and chores really equip our children with the confidence, grit and work ethic to go out into the world and dare to follow, and work for, dreams.   When kids have responsibilities, it nurtures their sense of self-worth which relates to self-esteem.   Some parents don’t require their kids to do chores for a variety of reasons.  They may feel guilty about a touch circumstance such as divorce, health condition, or some other h

Parenting in the Rain, Episode 25 Divorce and Sports Are you a parent worried about your child through your divorce? Here’s a link to my s Free Parent Class http://jackieflynnconsulting.com/parentingthroughdivorce  In This Episode:   Brian Brunkow is a San Diego-based lawyer, Glazier Head Coach Academy speaker, and the author of Zero Offseason – a guidebook on divorce & sports parenting.   With a background in family law and coaching youth football, Brian’s focus is helping coaches and parents collaborate on the “ABC’s of Divorce & Effective Sports Parenting.”   When time and money is so commonly used as a weapon in divorce situations, the “ABC’s” : Aligning Goals, Following the Best Interests Standard & Controlling Controllables.  They help encourage the adults to stay focused on helping kids develop life skills thru positive youth sports lessons. Brian has a substantial background in coaching.   It’s important to keep the kids on the field and involved in sports to give them the life skills that

  In This Episode:   Robert Cox specializes in the treatment of Trauma and Autism Spectrum Disorder and uses mindfulness extensively in his practice.  He lectures nationally on autism and works as a consultant for children’s psychiatric hospitals in the development of Autism treatment programs.  Recently, he has become the lead consultant for the creation of a special needs school for autism in Cameroon, Africa.  He also provides consultation service for parents.  His expertise is valued all around the world. Mindfulness is really paying attention to one specific thing.  It is about being quiet long enough to create a space between the limbic region and the forebrain. Taste can be used in mindfulness activities. This works great with kids that may not be able to understand some of the more complex tasks.  It’s important to involve all of the senses.  It’s really about teaching them to pay attention to one thing at time. Mindfulness with kids with ADHD and Autism Spectrum Disorder can help with focus, calm and

Parenting in the Rain, Episode 23 Practical Understanding of Sensory Processing Disorder In This Episode:   Lindsey Biel, MA, OTR/L, a pediatric occupational therapist in private practice, lives in New York City. She describes an Occupational Therapist as a person that works with people in many areas to optimize the function of daily life skills. Sensory Processing is how we transform bits of information that we get through our senses into meaningful messages in the world around us and what to do with them. Sensory Processing Disorder is when there are differences in how a person’s wiring works, as well as the person is experience the world in a different way. They may experience out of proportion reactions to everyday sensory experiences. Sensory challenges are seen more often in people with the following: Autism Spectrum Disorder, children born and adopted internationally from orphanages, premature babies (especially the youngest and the smallest), Down syndrome, Fragile X Syndrome, ADHD, exposure to drugs

Dalena Dillman Taylor, PhD, LPC, RPT, is an assistant professor at the University of Central Florida, past president of the North Texas Association for Play Therapy (2013–2014), and the play therapy certificate coordinator at UCF. Dr. Dillman Taylor graduated from the University of North Texas with doctorate of philosophy in counseling, with a specialty in play therapy in 2013. Dr. Dillman Taylor is a trained Adlerian play therapist and focuses her research on the effectiveness of Adlerian play therapy with children and adolescents who demonstrate disruptive behaviors or academic difficulties in the classroom and at home. In This Episode:   Child Parent Relationship Therapy, also known as CPRT, was developed as an adaptation of the Gurney’s Filial Model. Garry Landreth adapted this model to be delivered in 10 weeks. This type of therapy teaches parents Child Centered Play Therapy skills in an experiential way. It strengthens the relationship between children and their parents and/or caregivers. This program

Parenting in the Rain, Episode 21 How to Make Divorce Easier for Kids with Child Therapist, Jackie Flynn Sign-up for Jackie’s Free Class “How to Create an Emotionally Safe Environment for Your Child through Divorce” at www.jackieflynnconsulting.com/class In This Episode:   FREE DOWNLOAD www.jackieflynnconsulting.com/divorce Don’t Expect Your Child to Pick a “Side” Do not expect your child to choose sides before, during, or after the divorce. Respect your child’s right and need to love, honor and respect the other parent. Be Present with Your Child Make the precious time that you get with your child quality time. Resist the urge to ask questions about time with the other parent. Also, take this time to truly connect with your child, as this can be a painful adjustment and strong parent child relationships are more important than ever. Speak Respectfully About the Other Parent Avoid "talking trash" about the other parent, whether directly or within earshot while talking to others. This can leave your child feel

Parenting in the Rain, Episode 20 Melissa’s Mantras: for Nurturing Responsibility, Independence, and Confidence in Children with Autism Spectrum Disorder In This Episode:   Melissa Braun, Ed.S is a loving parent, an educator, a school staffing specialist and a person passionate about advocating for kids.  Melissa shares her 5 mantras below.     Have a Growth Mindset.   Melissa points out the power of the word “yet”.  She points out that we need to focus on what they can do and what supports and services they need to be successful.   Be the Advocate (all) Our Children Need You to Be.   Melissa emphasizes that we need to advocate for what we want our child to become.  This helps them to become a self-advocate as they grow and develop as well.   Embrace Healthy Conflict and Difficult Conversations.   With so many people on teams for children with special needs, there is likely going to be disagreements and conflicts along the way. Expect conflict and know that conflict is because people care about yo

In This Episode:   Hannah’s Heroes is a nonprofit organization that is on a mission of youth suicide prevention. Lyn Cline, co-founder and president of “Hannah's  Heroes. “After the tragedy of losing my beautiful daughter, Hannah to suicide, I couldn't allow her to become another teenage statistic. With friend, and former teammate, Liz Mikitarian, Hannah’s Heroes was born.” Lyn tells us that Hannah was a well-rounded young girl that they never expected was deeply depressed and at risk of death by suicide.  The evening before she “took her life” she was planning with her mother for short term and long term events.  It was a complete shock.  She thought she had the world at her fingertips.  “Don’t ever think this can’t be your kids”. Lyn urges parents to put away the electronic devices and connect and spend time with their kids. “You need to know what the kids are doing online.”   Liz Mikitarian, has worked with children for over 30 years. She earned Bachelors and Master’s degrees in Elementary Education.  She

Parenting in the Rain, Episode 18 When a Child has Suicidal Thoughts In This Episode:   Below are some snippets from a conversation with Jonathan Singer, LCSW, Ph.D.  on this episode of Parenting in the Rain podcast. Jonathan shares that suicide is the 2nd leading cause of death in the United States.   “Risk factors” are different than “warning signs” when talking about the issue of suicide. Risk factors are conditions that increase the person’s chance that they may try to take their life by suicide.  It is important to know that having risk factors doesn’t equate to suicide ideation or intent. Warning signs are things that let you know that there are foreseeable plans for suicide in the near future.   It’s important that a thorough assessment is done by a mental health professional if warning signs are present.   Expressing “hopeless” about the future and talking about a plan are some warning signs to be aware of. It’s important for parents to listen to their children, especially when warning signs are prese

In This Episode:   Pam Dyson tells us all about Play Therapy.   Play therapy is different than a child just playing.   Play therapy may look and feel differently with different therapists.  Some therapists allow the child to lead the play in some situations and other situations may be a bit more directive by the therapists.   The relationship between the therapist and the child is key in regards to meeting the treatment goals. Pam customizes her approach for each child and each family to ensure that she meets their specific needs. Pam Dyson trains therapist in Play Therapy techniques through their work.  She is a strong believer in ongoing training for therapist to stay abreast of new approaches. Play therapy can help with all kinds of behavioral and emotional challenges that a child may have such as grief and lost from a death, divorce, adoption, anxiety, depression, traumas, life changes, ADHD, Autism Spectrum Disorder, Learning Disabilities, and so much more. Its important parents to work closely with the

Parenting in the Rain, Episode 15 Tips for Successful Co-Parenting (even in high conflict situations) In This Episode:  (this information is also available on the free download)      Lorrie Brook provides some tips regarding Communication & Respect for parents struggling with co-parenting in separation and divorce situations in their families. Communication It is important that despite living in 2 separate households you both maintain an open line of communication within the family.  If you aren’t sure if it is something worth telling ask yourself this: Use this question as your guide –“If this happened in the other parent’s household would I want to know?”  If the answer is yes – let them know. When you are communicating with the other types remember these tips:  1. Be polite 2. Be concise 3. Don’t exaggerate, embellish or understate what happened. Tell it as it is. Respect While co-parents are no longer in a romantic relationship with each other, they are in a co-parenting relationship and as such respe

In This Episode: In this episode, Penny Williams tells us what her journey of parenting a child with ADHD and Autism has been like for her and her family. She shares some helpful strategies such as validating her child’s feelings during times of upset, remaining calm during stressful situations such as meltdowns and tantrums, communicating with the school, and much more. She recommends that parents advocate for their child’s needs and educate themselves as much as possible.  Knowledge and understanding is key. She refers to her son as “Ricochet” to respect his privacy.  His soccer coach gave him that nickname at his first day of practice at 4 years old. At first she didn’t realize that his behavior was out of the ordinary.  Feedback from peers and teachers helped her to realize that something was going on and there was a need to seek more information from a specialist.  She eventually sought out an appointment with a Developmental Specialist, which took a while to get an appointment.  During that time she re

Parenting in the Rain, Episode 14 Meeting My Sister, Melissa: A Story of Love, Adoption, and Connection In This Episode: In this episode, I share a story that is close to my heart.   A story about meeting my sister, Melissa, which was adopted at birth. At the time of her adoption, our sweet mom was struggling, without the means to even provide food and shelter for herself, much less a baby.   My sister found out later in life that she was adopted and started searching for us.  Eventually she found us in January 2015.   I will remember the day that I first met her.  We spoke via phone since she lives about 1,000 miles away from us.  It felt surreal.    In March, just a couple of months later, her husband and sons flew down to meet us all in person.   We had a big family gathering with BBQ, tug-of-war, and family togetherness. I cherish the pictures that we took that day, as they bring back so many warm memories. Unfortunately, our mom was diagnosed with lung cancer.  As you can imagine, we were all devastated

Parenting in the Rain, Episode 13 Nurturing Emotionally Healthy Kids through Play with Debra Wessleman, MS, LIMHP In This Episode: Debra Wesselmann, the author of Integrative Parenting: Strategies for Raising Children Affected by Attachment Trauma, gives us 6 tips to help nurture our children’s emotional health through play. Stay Attuned By Staying Present – Put away the electronics and truly connect with your child through play. Stay Attuned By Letting Your Child Take The Lead – Let your child choose what and how to play.  This helps support your child’s feelings of self-worth and self-efficacy.  It also strengthens relationships. Be Aware That Your Child’s Play Activities May Not Match His Or Her Chronological Age – Meet your child where he is at.  Resist the urge to influence him to play with games and toys that you consider to be appropriate for his age.  For example, an adolescent may like to play with dolls and that is okay. Keep It Fun By Finding Ways To Play That You Both Enjoy – It’s import

Cutting to Cope: Understanding the Emotional Desperation behind Self-Harm In This Episode: Self-harm can be used as a desperate attempt to relieve some physiological and psychological tension. Self-injurious behaviors include: cutting, carving, scratching, branding, marking, burning, scraping, biting, bruising, hitting, and other ways of hurting oneself.  Self-harming behaviors can increase the risk of suicide because of the emotional problems that trigger self-harming behaviors, but it doesn’t meant that the person is suicidal.  Seek professional help is you or your child is engaging in self harming behavior. Self-harm is more common with teens, than any other age group in the life span.  It has become an “epidemic” in some populations. Finding out that your child is harming themselves can feel frightening, mysterious, and confusing. Self-injury is sometimes used as a desperate attempt to diminish tough emotions, to achieve proof of “alive-ness”, or relieve emotional pain.   Sometimes, when kids hear that s

In This Episode: Internet safety is really more about the relationship with our children than it is about the technology. It’s important to know more than our kids about the internet. It’s like teaching our kids how to drive – teaching them the specifics, then giving them expectations, and then moving forward with trust.   Training our kids how to be safe on line is so important.   Teaching them how to navigate the internet responsibly is key! The child/parent relationship is so important! Mark recommends teaching children to come to their parents when they see things on the internet that they are unsure of, embarrassed, or nervous about. Some children have such advanced technological knowledge, so it is important to keep up to date and have access to monitor.   Sometimes children will “friend” a parent on a social media account, but then create another account that the parent may not know about. Mark talks about Digital Citizenship, being a good person online.   Having good character is so important. Cyberb

Parenting in the Rain, Episode 10 11 Tips to Homework Success  for You & Your Child with Attention Deficit Disorder In This Episode: 1st Tip: Routine Is it difficult to fit homework into your busy schedules?  Have you ever been up with your child at 10pm or later struggling to finish homework? Scheduling a set time each day, preferably right after school, can help tremendously.  Routines help people feel secure, safe, and in control.  This holds especially true for children with focus issues struggling with homework productivity.  A solid routine should look, feel, and sound the same each day.    For example:   4:00 pm Eat Snack, Drink Water, Take Shoes Off 4:10 pm Set Up Homework Materials (paper, pencils, pens, books, etc) in the same, distraction reduced/free place each day 4:30 pm Take a 1-2 Minute Stretch Break , Walk Around (Set Timer) 4:32 pm Resume Doing Homework (20 Minutes Later Take Another Break)   2nd Tip: Enjoyment Do you ever feel like a “tyrant” parent at homework time? Yelling, t

Parenting in the Rain, Episode 9 Helping Picky Eaters Try New, Healthy Foods with Jill Castle In This Episode:   Jill Castle is America’s Childhood Nutrition Expert.  She is a registered dietitian/nutritionist and a childhood nutrition expert. With over 25 years of experience with babies, toddlers, children and teens, in a variety of settings from private practice and consulting to author and writer.   Jill has 4 children, so she knows what it is like to feed healthy meals to kiddos on a busy schedule. In this episode, Jill gives us some practical tips that we can use to successfully take on the issue of picky eating in our families. Always make sure that when you feed your child, you include a “safe” food in the selection.  This increases the child’s comfort zone and likeliness to try new foods. Tasting a new food could be smelling, kissing, licking, etc...  Every, little step along the way is progress. Being patient with your child is SO important.  The more pressure that you put on your child, the more re