Healthy Family Connections

In this episode, Neil responds to a mother who is a single parent to her only child.  Mom wonders what went wrong when her delightful son turned into a difficult, contrary teenager.  Neil speaks to a common dynamic of single parent/only child families and gives Mom the tools to put a rapidly deteriorating situation back on track.

In this episode, Neil offers strategies for managing the many people challenges that come along with this special Holiday. Parent needs first, establishing expectations with children, teens and young adults, and dealing with difficult family member behaviors.

In this episode, Neil responds to a mom who struggles against a coalition of her husband and young adult kids.  Unfortunately, there is a lot at stake because Dad has significant health risks.  Neil introduces three family assessment criteria and shows how they apply and how, with this knowledge, Mom can create change.

In this episode, Neil responds to a question about paying kids for good grades.  Neil addresses the question of how and when to reward kids without undermining intrinsic motivation.  

In this episode, Neil responds to a mom struggling with her gifted and talented 17-year-old daughter who is terrorizing the family.  Mom and Dad have helped manage her emotions for years, but now at age 17 it’s only getting worse.

In this episode, Neil responds to the many emails he received asking for more about Parental Guilt.  Neil looks at the healthy functions of guilt as well as the unhealthy and destructive experience of guilt.  He explains its sources and what can be done to reduce and heal unhealthy guilt.

In this episode, Neil responds to a mother concerned that her young adult son is addicted to marijuana.  He’s academically gifted, graduated college, but now is languishing and mom can’t get through to him.

In this episode, Neil responds to a mother who is aware that family dynamics have been damaging and now her children are young adults.  Mom wants to know what she can do to help them recover.

In this episode, Neil responds to a mother who feels pulled between continuing to support her teen daughter’s interests and feeling resentful and withdrawing that support and feeling guilty. 

In this episode, Neil responds to a Mom who is struggling to get her husband to stop yelling at her and the kids. Neil shows this Mom how to empower herself and communicate with her husband in a way that models the values and standards she wants to see in their home.

In this episode, Neil discusses an article from the Psychotherapy Networker about the different ways that therapists approach learning their craft. Neil shows how this concept applies to how parents approach parenting and the best way to make sure your preferred approach is successful.

In this episode, Neil responds to a mother wondering if she needs to be concerned about her 16-year-old son’s lack of social interest and motivation. Neil empowers Mom to take an active role in helping her son get assessed and get the support he needs to grow his social skills.  Neil emphasizes the importance of therapists addressing both the unique issues with each young client as well as the contextual issues that support the problem.

In this episode, Neil responds to the father of a gifted 10-year-old boy who doesn’t ever finish things.  He quits when things get challenging. Dad realizes that he’s starting to build a Control Battle with his son and wants to know how to avoid it before it gets any worse.

In this episode, Neil responds to a mom who has struggled to cope with and help her abusive husband.  With four young kids, mom feels like she has two bad choices; stay in the marriage or divorce.

In this episode, Neil responds to a mom who has struggled to understand and get help for her young teen daughter with anxiety.  Mom felt relieved to get a diagnosis of mild ASD, but daughter rejected it and mom wants to know what to do next.

In this episode, Neil responds to a Mom whose 16 year old son is using his size and strength to intimidate his mother.  Neil offers a strategy to get her and her son into therapy and shines a light on the difference between effective and ineffective therapies.

In this episode, Neil responds to a mom who knows her teenager is capable and will want to go to college, but the only way they do their work is when she nags.  Mom wants to know what she can do besides nagging or letting them fail.  Neil looks at how therapists often respond to these kinds of situations, why the approach is counterproductive, and how to get it right.

In this episode, Neil responds to a Mom whose adult son is trying to help his wife who suffers from complex trauma and grief.  Neil shows Mom a way to get her son the help he needs.

In this episode, Neil responds to a mom struggling with what to do about her 18 year-old son, whose girlfriend spends the night.  The problem is that they make noise during sex and it’s bothering others.  Neil helps this Mom realize that her model of parenting will not be effective to deal with this problem or many others. Neil shows how therapy can be helpful to mom and the whole family when approached in the right way.

In this episode, Neil responds to a Mom whose young adult son threatens suicide when she talks with him about getting a job or growing up. He has bipolar disorder, is “in treatment” and isn’t showing any bipolar symptoms . She says it feels like she’s living with a terrorist.  Neil shows Mom how to not allow herself to be held hostage, take her son’s threats seriously, and get things moving forward.